Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
