Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
