8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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