Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
