best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
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