i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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