I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
my shit smells like andre
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Randomize
