You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.