what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Randomize
