I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Randomize