i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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