It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
