It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
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Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
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there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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