Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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