Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
