So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
