Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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