I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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