Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize