Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Randomize
