Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
