We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
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Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I'm really busy with my period
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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