I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
