Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Mom said you looked used
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
