a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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