Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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