Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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