Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
