He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize