Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(804): View more from Virginia

Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys

(1-804): View more from Virginia

wow, that really makes you stop and think.

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(804): Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys (1-804): wow, that really makes you stop and think. http://tfl.nu/7oma

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(216): View more from Ohio

you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.

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(216): you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently. http://tfl.nu/85of

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(856): View more from New Jersey

If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.

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(856): If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection. http://tfl.nu/y6yr

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(949): View more from California

if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.

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(949): if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation. http://tfl.nu/12m7

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(+44): View more from England

Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.

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(+44): Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'. http://tfl.nu/zxab

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(847): View more from Illinois

A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college

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(847): A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college http://tfl.nu/uf6j

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(913): View more from Kansas

I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.

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(913): I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better. http://tfl.nu/gf52

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(951): View more from California

His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format

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(951): His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format http://tfl.nu/g7e8

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(763): View more from Minnesota

Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.

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(763): Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking. http://tfl.nu/53g7

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(909): View more from California

He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.

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(909): He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult. http://tfl.nu/s4nn

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(732): View more from New Jersey

yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"

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(732): yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing" http://tfl.nu/qoaq

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(949): View more from California

Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.

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(949): Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand. http://tfl.nu/6vlj

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(850): View more from Florida

Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.

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(850): Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made. http://tfl.nu/7051

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(416): View more from Toronto

The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting

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(416): The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting http://tfl.nu/ap7m

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(404): View more from Georgia

Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.

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(404): Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up. http://tfl.nu/ge7g

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