Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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