you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
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