Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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