They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
