At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
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