So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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