can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
