During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I'm always down for nudity.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
