Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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