She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize
