Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
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