I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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