no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
