I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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