My brain says no but my pants say off.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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