one two three fourrrrnication!
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize