it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
