Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
