He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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