Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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